(our wall gallery, at Eden’s height)

There have been many bad nights around here, which have resulted in bad days.

Just the other day I was complaining to Phil that I was so far from being the mum that i want to be.

And then yesterday, inbetween the moaning and the tantruming and the shrieking there was an hour that went right. An hour of me making the choices I wish I always made, and my two year

old being up for it.

We did butterfly splotch paintings, which were a BIG hit. They are something that I really can let go and let him do.
And then, when I went outside to hang them on our closeline, a bare-bummed, bare-footed child followed me out. I started to tell him that he could only come out with shoes on, and then stopped-  because why? Sure, the tarmac isn’t fabulous for feet but it’s not bad either. So I offered shoes, and he declined. He then demanded his paddling pool, so I complied.

Obviously his paddling pool wasn’t for going in, but for a large access to water and to just generally be naked. So water went down the slide and he followed. We had to come up with a landing pad (half of a foot muff from our pram) because his bum got a little too scraped up! But it was good. It was good to just let him try and see. It was good to follow his lead and not worry.

I don’t want to be the mum who doesn’t let her child run in playgrounds. I hate hearing parents tell their children that they *will* fall/get hurt. They *might*, so? Did we never have scraped knees? My parents let me climb trees and explore and gave me a guided freedom. I wish that for my children too.

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2 thoughts on “

  1. Hello, I found your blog through Kat’s link @ slugs on the refrigerator, and I just wanted to make a wee comment on this post. I am reading this
    ( https://www.amazon.co.uk/Good-Behaviour-Book-better-behaved-child/dp/0007198248/ref=sr_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1305618469&sr=1-4 ) just now, its the Sears Good Behaviour Book, and your post reminded me of some of the things in the book. I am still only a part way in, but it does seem to be as much about teaching the parents good behaviour as the children. Imagine if you had grabbed him up and bundled him back inside? If someone did that to an adult we would be appalled, after all he wasn’t actually doing anything bad. I wanted to say, Well done you. I need much more practice at this. There seems to be a fine line between no discipline and choosing the things that actually need discipline. There was an interesting chapter on ‘grabbing’ things from little fingers, and I am really guilty of that. I never stopped to think about the physical mess you may have to clean up versus the emotional mess if you snatch away something that the child dearly wanted to investigate.
    Hehe what a rambler I am. But like I said, I was very impressed you were relaxed enough give freedom like this, I will try and remember this post throughout the day with my 2 year old.
    Val
    xxx

    • Hi! Thanks! I often have to remind myself that he is just being a two year old… One of the best things I’ve read about parenting talks about keeping magic alive for your kids- that they don’t need to know that laying on the beach in the tide will result in a nightmare of andy hair, they need to just be allowed to experience the beach! I try try try to keep this as my mantra.

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